Face your fears
16 April 2013 15:37![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
prettygoodyearI was always of the assumption I always ran away from my fears, but with all the shit happening at work, I realise I actually face them, most of the time. I often keep quiet about a lot of things, but whenever something is really bothering me, I speak up. I want things to be resolved, I have to understand the why's and how's of things that have happened. It's fucking scary though, cause I'm always facing and fighting it alone, even though I have people who support me. It's still me who has to deal with everything.
I sent out an email to my boss and his wife (also my colleague) who I had my previous 2 talks with. I asked a lot of questions, about what certain things that were said were based on, why they fear confrontations so much and what I've ever done to let them believe that talking to me would result in something horrible.
I haven't heard back from them, but have to go to work tonight though. I know my intentions are good, I never try to hurt anyone. I know I'm in my right to ask these questions and get answers. I know. But it feels fucking scary though, cause it's me against the rest.
The *funny* thing is though, that I had a dream about this about a week ago, which I wrote an entry about. My boss' wife apparently also had a dream about it, in which I had called in some parents and children from school to also have a say in things and speak on my behalf, or something like that.
We'll see what will happen to tonight. I'm scared though, but that's because no matter what, I''ll always still doubt myself, even when it's totally uncalled for.
This entry was originally posted at http://prettygoodyear.dreamwidth.org/252487.html. Please comment there using OpenID.
I sent out an email to my boss and his wife (also my colleague) who I had my previous 2 talks with. I asked a lot of questions, about what certain things that were said were based on, why they fear confrontations so much and what I've ever done to let them believe that talking to me would result in something horrible.
I haven't heard back from them, but have to go to work tonight though. I know my intentions are good, I never try to hurt anyone. I know I'm in my right to ask these questions and get answers. I know. But it feels fucking scary though, cause it's me against the rest.
The *funny* thing is though, that I had a dream about this about a week ago, which I wrote an entry about. My boss' wife apparently also had a dream about it, in which I had called in some parents and children from school to also have a say in things and speak on my behalf, or something like that.
We'll see what will happen to tonight. I'm scared though, but that's because no matter what, I''ll always still doubt myself, even when it's totally uncalled for.
This entry was originally posted at http://prettygoodyear.dreamwidth.org/252487.html. Please comment there using OpenID.