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prettygoodyearThere should be a way right, a way to find my old self back again? Cause I've lost it so many months ago and no matter how hard I try, I'm just not coming back. For months and months now I feel like i'm watching down on myself from up above. I feel like i'm not here, feel like i don't really belong here anymore. Things used to bring me so much joy, but it's been so long since I felt that pure joy.
Thoughts of being gone from this planet have been entering my head over and over again the last couple of weeks, if not even months. Not that I will every do something to myself, it's just...if someone decides my life is over, I would be totally okay with it. I just feel so fucking useless lately that I just feel like it will be all just for the better if i'm not here anymore...sad isn't it? I know it is....
It's just...my self esteem is so low lately, just because of things that have happened during the last couple of months. Things I've believed in for so long, which represented my life, they have been wiped away all of a sudden. And it's just hard to move on from there.
This Wednesday i have an appointment with someone who might be of help. Not a professional helper or anything. And i have no hopes up at all, don't expect a thing at all. I've lost my hopes and trust a long time ago. But I'm hoping it will get back to me again soon so that i'll be able to be happy with myself again, enjoy life, respect the things I do etc...
Just crossing fingers for myself...
Thoughts of being gone from this planet have been entering my head over and over again the last couple of weeks, if not even months. Not that I will every do something to myself, it's just...if someone decides my life is over, I would be totally okay with it. I just feel so fucking useless lately that I just feel like it will be all just for the better if i'm not here anymore...sad isn't it? I know it is....
It's just...my self esteem is so low lately, just because of things that have happened during the last couple of months. Things I've believed in for so long, which represented my life, they have been wiped away all of a sudden. And it's just hard to move on from there.
This Wednesday i have an appointment with someone who might be of help. Not a professional helper or anything. And i have no hopes up at all, don't expect a thing at all. I've lost my hopes and trust a long time ago. But I'm hoping it will get back to me again soon so that i'll be able to be happy with myself again, enjoy life, respect the things I do etc...
Just crossing fingers for myself...